23 02 2013

My father-in-law just got moved into a senior’s lodge today. He has been in hospital all this time, even though his health had improved. He was not able to be at home, so they kept him in a bed at the hospital. Thankfully, it is in the same city as his wife, even though she is in a different lodge.  They may eventually be able to be in the same lodge, just not in the same area. His level of care requires nurses, to look after his colostomy, while my mother-in-law is self-sufficient health wise. So far she is able to walk to the dining room on her own – with the help of a walker – so she does not require the same level of care.



From One To Another

23 12 2012

The father-in-law has been hospitalized for 2 weeks now, after the HomeCare nurse/co-ordinator found that he was very ill. His kidneys were failing – possibly from overuse of Advil along with Arthrotec. The MRI discovered a massive growth on the hip muscle, a possible cause of the severe pain he has been feeling in that area. We are awaiting biopsy results now.

We hope that he will be alright.

I will not post again until we have the results.

The mother-in-law is happy at the lodge where she has been for about 3 weeks now. So that is all good.


27 10 2012

We got the in-laws settled, as mother-in-law went home this past week, temporary until she  goes to a lodge. Father-in-law will follow. He is a bit better to cope than she is, with staying at home, with HomeCare coming in.

She has quit smoking! She started at age 13, and is about 73 years old now, but 2
months in hospital and the temporary lodge got her settled to be a quitter.

I am encouraging her twice a week,when we meet on the computer via Skype to
continue to not smoke, and keep her goals in mind.

We are very proud of her, to stick with the no smoking. Her voice is stronger and she no longer coughs after a bit of conversation.

For any smokers out there, it is never too late to quit. If she can do it, so can you!

The Cycle

29 09 2012

The mom-in-law is back now in her home city, sent from that hospital to a care centre, until either 1. she will be ready to go home with Home Care coming in or 2. a spot opens in a care center for her right away.

I suspect she will need to go back to the house to wait. We will be going up soon to organize the house contents some more – taking to the landfill, or donating or setting aside to wash and then consign clothes at that time.  It is a huge job.

Just now listening to The Living Years by Mike and the Mechanics on WinAmp thinking about when this song first came out – my mom and stepdad were still alive. Now it’s time for the inlaws to move into a senior’s centre and so it goes.

Again music unites the past and the present and the future.





And So It Goes

8 09 2012

Mother-in-law is doing well and should be home soon, or in a senior’s lodge. Son has still not been here to visit or to bring our coffee, which his company sells. We get our orders from him, but have to wait until he has time to bring the supply.

I have been stressed out from the visiting at the hospital, but of course that is what one does when family needs us and is ill.

I am so tired. Does it get better? I don’t believe it does. When one crisis is over another seems to appear.

I have been thinking about the educational system and a news report that students at one school were not to have marks of 0% even if they did not submit a report for grading. The teacher who gave a 0% is probably going to lose his job. No wonder we have such poor quality young people that cannot show up for work because they have no ambition and no sense of self respect or initiative.

What happened to the teachers with training in university that learned psychology
and how to interact with young people? Seems to be lost in the sea of political correctedness and that is a major loss to society.

In-Laws and Quality of Life

1 09 2012


This past week we have dealing with the in-laws and their health issues.

I am trying to decide what steps my husband and I should take to prepare for the last few years of our lives. The in-laws have hoarding and denial issues, so things are difficult. We do have the assistance of some other family members who only want the best outcome for them so that is really a help.

I have no illusions that my son and his wife will be any help at all – they are way to busy with their own lives and have absolutely no interest in us and our aging related problems.

Truthfully, I would love to be able to tell them that ‘we are moving’ *somewhere far away* and we’ll let them know when we are settled, but that is an unrealistic dream.

It is really depressing to know that your children cannot be relied on to do the best for you and to help when it is needed.

Oh well, we will cope as is necessary.


Life, Death and the In-Between

18 08 2012



I have been thinking about end of life issues this week

It started with my elderly cat – he is 88 years old in human years – and his problems with his hind foot.

He’s been checked by the vet and all blood work and urine tests were okay.  We

think we are looking at arthritis in that leg and will probably need to try steroids to treat it.

My mom-in-law and I talked about old pets and euthanasia.  She and I agree that if an animal is in pain and is suffering it is kindest to have them put to sleep.

Her son and his common law wife differ in their thinking – they will spare no expense to keep their pets (cats) alive no matter the cost or the treatment involved.  They are also vegan, so perhaps this attitude ties in to their lifestyle.

I do not feel it necessary to prolong life once the best is gone, and there is pain
involved for a pet. I think it is kindness to stop the suffering.

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