Those Whiny Inlaws

11 01 2014

I have a confession to make. I hate talking with my mother-in-law. Why? Because she’s a whiner.

I know we need to have some patient with the elderly, but sometimes it ‘s better to avoid the problems in the first place.

She gets depressed and then she starts to think, going over and over all the worst things that have happened in her life, and then she thinks of all the mistakes she’s made. Then she moves on to all the mean things her husband, relatives and friends have done to her. It becomes a huge ball of darkness that weighs down on her and makes her unable to think of anything else.

She’s been on medications for her mental health issues over the years, but refuses to take them most of the time. She won’t help herself. She’d rather whine and be a martyr.

I had been her nearly sole support and outlet for her feelings for two years or more, but since her move to the senior’s home, she and I have not been meeting up via the computer like we used to do. My health issues, also, have been another reason.

I won’t ever go back to the way it was – her complaining, while I listened. It was too much of a downer for me.

She now has activities at the senior’s home so she doesn’t need to rely on me as her only interaction with the outside world anymore. I am glad of that. I can stay away without feeling too bad. I deserved better. That is something I have learned over this past year.

So she is there, and I am here, and I am happy. Her, not so much.

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New Year, New Start

4 01 2014

 

I am back after a long hiatus. Health issues resolved, sort of.

The in-laws are doing well, both happy in their respective lodges. My father-in-law has reduced kidney function so we do not expect him to be around forever.He and the mother-in-law have both gone back to being smokers.

My husband’s birth mom, at 87, has been diagnosed with inoperable liver and pancreatic cancer. She was given six months, and that was in October.There are others with health issues in the family, too.

2013 was not a good year. I hope that 2014 is better. I always love the beginning of a new year. The new calendar on the wall, and new days ahead.Perhaps I will write more, and more often now.

 





Moved

23 02 2013

My father-in-law just got moved into a senior’s lodge today. He has been in hospital all this time, even though his health had improved. He was not able to be at home, so they kept him in a bed at the hospital. Thankfully, it is in the same city as his wife, even though she is in a different lodge.  They may eventually be able to be in the same lodge, just not in the same area. His level of care requires nurses, to look after his colostomy, while my mother-in-law is self-sufficient health wise. So far she is able to walk to the dining room on her own – with the help of a walker – so she does not require the same level of care.

 








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